A Written and Visual Improvement
December 19th, 2019
For my final portfolio, I chose to revise my WP3 argument and to improve my WIX Site. My revisions of my WP3 argument focused on clarifying my thesis and opening paragraph. I also changed the location of certain paragraphs to better organize the argument. I improved my WIX site by modifying the structure. Rough drafts are now on separate pages to better show the changes made to the visual aspect of the essays between drafts. Over the semester I learned new methods of forming arguments and was exposed to a variety of types of writing. This helped me to understand how the audience and the overall purpose of an essay can be reflected in how I write.
Focusing on one topic throughout the course was a great benefit to my writing. I was able to use my research from previous writing assignments and build on that throughout the semester. By the time the formal argument was assigned I had enough familiarity with the topic to write confidently and knowledgeably on the thesis I chose. The singular topic also helped me to see how information can be used in different ways, whether it be for a film review, a personal narrative, or an argument. Different writing styles are used for each genre of writing, but writing methods like a multiple-source synthesis can be used effectively in different types of writing.
The series of assignments throughout the class allowed me to learn new writing methods and exposed me to writers who used a variety of methods to effectively explain their story or argument. Learning about the ICE-ICE method has helped to improve how I think about incorporating and supporting my arguments. Using two quotes to support an argument is something I have done before but the ICE-ICE method helps me to structure a better way of conveying my point to readers. After learning to better synthesize information the point I was attempting to make clearer.
Before learning about ICE-ICE:
“Tommy a fellow climber who was well acquainted with El Capitan gave his support and experience because he knew any information or help he could give Alex would make the climb safer for him (Chin and Vasarhelyi). Jimmy Chan the director knew that Alex would make the climb whether they were filming or not and used this reasoning to justify his involvement in the film (The New York Times). Justifying the film crew’s decision to work on the film and also justifying Alex’s reasons for wanting to undertake such a feat became a central part of the story being told.” (Excerpt from film review)
After learning about ICE-ICE:
“For climbers who would like to experience outdoor climbing, indoor gyms can be a great tool for educating new climbers on how to reduce the impact they have on the environment. In Indoor Weekly's article, they note that "Rock climbing gyms… let you start climbing in a safe, controlled, and monitored environment. Climbing gyms are set up and run so that climbers are safe." (Gripped) Indoor climbing gyms serve beginners as a jumping-off point, a place where they can assess their skill level and decide whether they would like to continue with the sport in a relatively safe environment. If new climbers choose to try their skills in outdoor climbing we can use the educational environment at indoor gyms to pass on knowledge and information on how to cause minimal impact on the environment doing it. The Access Fund, a national organization dedicated to conserving climbing areas, agrees there is an opportunity for indoor gyms to "serve as good focal points for information distribution and feedback" (Attarian) By using the fact that most new climbers start off climbing at gyms to our advantage we can make them aware of their environmental responsibility before they start climbing outdoors at all.” (Excerpt from my formal argument)
Creating a WIX site to display my essays enabled me to incorporate graphics and bring emphasis to specific quotes. This was a new way to look at writing for me. Previous courses all expected essays to be text only, whereas some things are better described in photographs. In my immersion experience narrative for example, the pictures allow a person who has never been to a rock climbing gym understand what I am describing. In addition to images in the article itself I was able to choose backgrounds for my articles that would appeal to the target audience or convey a setting.
Film Review
Gives the sensation of height like being high off the ground while climbing.
Reflection Essay
Reflection theme but also keeping with the idea of nature
Formal Argument
Nature like what can be seen near outdoor climbing areas.
Adding these features makes the writing more interesting and engaging and learning to use this in my writing has helped me thing of writing as more than just the words themselves but also how they are presented.
By far my best improvement throughout the semester is my essay planning skills and building better essays through revision. The smaller assignments in the course helped me to outline essays and their structure prior to starting the essay itself. Assignments like “WP3 ARGUMENT Topic Proposal + foundational articles Due 10/18” helped serve as an outline for my rough draft.
The comments and descriptions left by peers also helped me to identify where I needed to improve arguments and clarify my purpose. The comments by Deborah Oesch Minor and the peer review of my draft gave me insight into how people were viewing my argument and how it could be improved. My peer reviewer commented that he does “agree … that we should prevent popular outdoor rock climbing destinations from being ruined”, helped me to see a theme to my overall argument and revise my thesis. “The more narrow the focus, the deeper you can dig into the topic” is what Professor Oesch Minor said in comment to my original thesis which was too broad a topic. In my revised thesis I narrowed my focus to the benefit of indoor climbing in relation to preservation of outdoor climbing spaces.
Overall this semester has given me new tools and new ways of looking at what I write. Focusing on relating my writing to my goal audience and better incorporating sources in to my writing has helped me write more effectively. Being given the opportunity to focus on one topic gave me time to settle into writing about a topic I was familiar with versus trying to write about something I did not yet have a good grasp on.